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Healing from Grief Is a Journey, Not a Destination
Healing from grief is not a destination—it is a continuous journey that may last a lifetime. Every day that you get through is a reflection of your resilience. Be proud of yourself, show gratitude to God, and on the tough days when it feels like you can barely get through, give yourself grace.
One thing you can always be sure of is that God is with you on both your good and bad days. When no one understands what you’re going through, when it feels like everyone else has moved on, or when people make you feel like you should just “get over it,” remember that God is never rushing your process. Find comfort in Him.
Finding Meaning in Scripture During Grief
I don’t want this post to feel like a cliché. We have all heard scriptures about who God can be in our time of mourning, grief, or sadness, but I truly believe we can lean into these scriptures in a deeply personal and therapeutic way.
Matthew 5:4 (NIV): Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.
As you read this post, I want you to genuinely believe that you are blessed and that God is your Comforter.
Daily Affirmation: I am blessed, even in my mourning, and God is my Comforter.
Say this daily, on difficult days, or whenever you need a reminder of God’s presence in your grief.
Grief Is Not Linear—It Looks Different for Everyone
Grief is not a straight path; it varies for each person. While grief is often associated with death, it can also come from a divorce, the end of a friendship, or even mourning the life you thought you would have at a certain time.
Regardless of the type of grief you are experiencing, do not let anyone minimize it or make you feel like your pain is insignificant.
Allow Yourself to Receive Support
During grief, it can be hard to know what you need. People often say, “Let me know if you need anything” or “I’m here for you”—but how do you accept support when you’re simply trying to make it through the day? This can lead to isolation.
Romans 12:15 (NIV): Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn.
The same people who rejoice with you can also support you in mourning. Continue to show up at church, allow your family to be there for you, and accept help. You can set boundaries for your peace, but don’t shut out the community God has placed in your life.
Coping with Grief in a World That Keeps Moving
When grief hits, life may feel like it has stopped for you—but for everyone else, it continues. There are still responsibilities: children to care for, bills to pay, jobs to show up to. How do you navigate grief while life keeps moving forward?
Psalm 34:18 (NIV): The LORD is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.
Every day may feel like a challenge, but God is near. Here are ways to cope while still living life:
1. Seek Professional Support
Find a grief therapist or support group. Talking to others who are in a similar situation can help you feel less alone.
2. Start a Grief Journal
Writing down your emotions can help you process them, whether you use a blank journal or a guided grief journal. These prompts can help you begin:
- How are you truly feeling today? What emotions are you carrying with you?
- What has felt overwhelming to you lately, and how can you show yourself grace in this area?
- What emotions are surfacing in your grief, and how have you been coping with them so far? Are these coping mechanisms helping or hurting?
- How have you been interacting with others during this time? Are you also taking care of yourself?
- If there is one thing that could bring you some peace or ease right now, what would it be?
- How do you feel about your relationship with God right now, and what do you think is contributing to it? What might help you feel more connected to Him during this time?
3. Honor Your Loved One (or What You Lost) Without Rumination
Do not pressure yourself to forget the person or situation you are grieving. Acknowledge that they were a part of your life, and be grateful for the seasons you shared—the lessons you learned, the ways you grew, and the happiness they brought. Honor their impact on your life, but do not dwell on regrets or ‘what-ifs.’ This will only keep your mind stuck in a cycle of processing things you cannot change. Instead, focus on the good, and if that feels difficult, focus on your growth.
4. Guard Your Heart and Mind
You are allowed to feel your feelings about any situation, but it’s important to manage those feelings so they don’t lead to sin or bring harm to yourself or others.
Ephesians 4:26-27 (NIV): “In your anger do not sin.” Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.
Grief can bring many emotions, including anger, but don’t let it consume you. The enemy will try to use your pain to lead you into destructive habits—don’t let him win.
Remember That God Can Use Your Pain
2 Corinthians 1:3-4 (NIV): Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.
Sometimes, God allows us to walk through grief so that one day we can help others who will experience the same pain. Don’t let grief stop you from being used by God—it could be the beginning of a new ministry, a support group, or a deeper connection with others.
Practical Tips for Coping with Grief
1. Take Care of Yourself
Try your best to shower daily. Get dressed, even if it’s just in clean clothes. Gradually add self-care habits back into your routine.
2. Let Others Help You
You don’t have to be the “strong one” all the time. Allow people to care for you—you are worthy of love and support.
3. Be Discerning About Dreams and Thoughts
The enemy can use familiarity to deceive. While dreams of loved ones may feel comforting, be cautious not to turn to them as a source of advice or guidance. The enemy often uses familiar spirits to mislead us. Focus on the living and cherish the memories you shared.
4. Give Yourself Permission to Cry
John 11:35 (NIV): Jesus wept.
Even Jesus grieved. Take mental health days when needed—call into work, ask someone to watch your children, put your phone on ‘do not disturb,’ and give yourself a day to rest and release some of your emotions.
5. Find Hope in Eternal Life
As believers, we have hope because we know that in Christ, there is life after death. 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 (NIV) reminds us that we do not grieve like those without hope, for we believe in the resurrection. Death is not the end. Thank God for the time you had with your loved one, and ask Him for peace until we are all reunited with the Lord.
6. Give Yourself Grace and Space
This is your grief journey—allow yourself to go through it at your own pace. Be patient with yourself, stay compassionate, and hold onto kindness. Grief can change you, but don’t let it harden your heart.
7. Avoid Negative Coping Mechanisms
Be mindful of how you cope with grief, as some habits—like excessive drinking, substance use, or extreme anger—can be harmful to you and others. If you’re struggling, know that you’re not alone. Support and resources are available to help you heal in a healthy way. You don’t have to wait until things feel overwhelming to seek help.
Embracing Healing and Moving Forward in Faith
I pray that this post has been a blessing to you and offers guidance as you navigate your grief. During this time, allow God to be your Comforter and be honest with your emotions. Give yourself permission to feel, but also the space to move forward when you’re ready. Grief may feel overwhelming, but remember, there is life beyond it—it’s about discovering what that life looks like for you. While you can’t bring back what was lost, you still have a life to live, and you deserve to live it fully. It’s common to feel guilt when you begin to move forward, but know that it’s okay. You are allowed to heal and find joy again. Embrace the emotions that come—both good and bad—as part of your journey toward peace.
A Prayer for Comfort
Lord, I want You to be my Comforter during this time of grief. Mend my broken heart and help me cope as I navigate life. Stay near to me and remind me that I am never alone. Do not allow the enemy to use my grief to consume me. Send good people to support me, and help me to accept their love. Give me the strength to care for myself and the wisdom to be kind, even when I am hurting. Use me as a testimony of Your comfort. Thank You for the time I had with what was once a part of my life, and may my future be filled with Your joy. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.
Additional Support & Resources
Grief can be difficult, but you don’t have to face it alone. Here are some additional resources to support you on this journey:
- Books on Grief
- Guided Grief Journals
- Counseling Services – Amwell, Brightside Health, Grow Therapy
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